Kombucha Calendar
Kombucha Calendar, a small reckoner that computes in your browser and stores nothing. No account, no cloud, no telemetry.
This is not a screenshot. It's the real tool, running right here: go on, put something in it.
Forged into a knife, this tool ages with use: the blades you reach for wear soft, entries you tend keep their bloom, and the years travel with the file through every reforge.
Your kombucha does not care that you have a life; it ferments on its own schedule and expects you to keep up. The Kombucha Calendar computes the timing of a brew — when a batch started on a given day will be ready, first ferment through second — so you are bottling on purpose instead of by apologetic surprise. It reckons the dates and stores nothing; the scoby keeps its own counsel.
Standing facts
- One HTML file. Opens in any modern browser, on any operating system.
- No account. No login, no sign-up, no e-mail wall.
- No cloud. Nothing leaves your browser: no server, no telemetry, no analytics.
- Yours forever. The file keeps working whether or not Offline.Ltd does.
- Ages with use. Entries you tend keep their bloom; the years travel with the file through every reforge.
In ten years
Kombucha Calendar computes; it doesn't hoard. Open the file in 2036 and it will do the same arithmetic it does today, because the arithmetic is written into the file and nothing about it needs a server to agree.
If Offline.Ltd closes tomorrow, nothing on your machine notices. That isn't a marketing promise; it's simply what a file is.
Getting your data out
There is nothing locked in to get out: copy the numbers, or keep the file. Either way you owe no one a request form. No export queue, no "we'll e-mail you a link within 48 hours", no format that only one vendor can read.
Copy the file to a USB stick, a NAS, a folder your devices already sync. It runs on Windows, macOS, Linux, Android and iOS, online or off, because a browser is the only thing it ever needed.
Who else sees this
Nobody. Kombucha Calendar works out its answer in your browser and forgets it the moment you close the tab: there is no store to breach, because nothing is stored. There is no account, no telemetry, no analytics, and no code in the file that opens a network connection, pull the cable and watch it carry on working. How privacy works across the Reckoners tools →
Questions people ask
How do I know when my kombucha will be ready?
Give it your start date and how long you ferment, and it computes when to taste, bottle, and finish. The calendar arithmetic is done for you; the tasting judgement stays yours.
Is this kombucha tool private, and does it need an account?
No account, no signup, nothing stored. It is a single HTML file running offline in your browser — it computes your brew dates on the spot and nothing leaves the page. Yours forever, like a good scoby.
Does it handle the second ferment too?
Yes — it reckons the full timeline, first ferment and second, from a single start date. The fizzy part of the schedule is the part most worth getting right.
Go deeper on Kombucha Calendar
More Reckoners
Fits your knife at weight 1. Nothing here is final, Knife follows Life. Reforging within your tier is free, forever. Add it, drop it, reforge it later; the file stays yours either way.